Dealing With Emotions When it Comes to No More Babies

By Janelle Turk

November 4, 2020

Janelle is a mother of 4 beautiful children, RN, sleep coach, lactation counselor and prenatal coach. She has a passion for working with new Mamas and easing the transition into parenthood. She believes in the value of qualified and professional support with zero judgement attached. "It's only a problem if it's a problem for you"!

So you have decided on “no more babies”.  You might be feeling relieved, sad, guilty, or any other number of emotions.  You are not alone, Mama.  If you have been blessed with the ability to decide for yourself when your family is complete, it is a big decision.  Maybe you confidently have known all along that 1,2, or 5 is enough, maybe you’ve never known.  Either way there are emotions involved!

How do you manage these emotions?  

Give yourself some grace! If you have a partner, lean on each other, make the decision as a united front.  Try to find peace in your decision, you made it for a reason so try to go back to that.

Talk about it.  Often the more we push the hard things aside, the more they bother us.  Talk to your partner, close friends, your parents, your “people”, let them know that you are struggling, or that you aren’t!  

Focus on the Positives.  Think about everything that you have, maybe it is 2 happy and loved kiddos, maybe it is the financial freedom that comes with having fewer babies. Stay positive, and practice gratitude.

Embrace the sadness.  Even if you are confident in your decision you may still have waves of sadness over your decision.  It is the end of an ‘era’ of sorts, and it can be rough!  Allow yourself to feel how you are feeling, and talk to a professional if you can’t seem to move past it.

Mama, I hear you.  I was completely confident that our family was complete after our fourth baby, but I still have moments of sadness that grip me hard.  Packing away the newborn clothes and supplies- I cried.  Packing away the high chair- I cried.  Packing away the crib- I was sad for a whole day.  Each milestone is a reminder of days gone by.  You know what though?  I am relieved to be done with it too.  I can’t imagine going through another pregnancy, another delivery, and those endless sleepless nights!  Time to move on, and allow myself to be at peace with our decision. 

There is no right or wrong decision when it comes to making the call on more babies or not, and it is NO one’s business but your own.  It might be hard right now, but it will get easier and you will get through it, whether you need some extra support or just need to process it in your own way.  You Got This Mama, and if you need support on your journey, I Got You!  

 

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